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Sunday, 9 April 2017

Top 10 funny things at our survey


Top 10 funny things heard at our survey (on the boat we didn't buy!)
1. Surveyor: The autopilot doesn’t work
Owner: Yes, it does.
Surveyor: It doesn’t turn the wheel.
Owner: I use it all the time.

2. Surveyor: The stove doesn’t work.
Owner: Yes, it does. I’ll show you (see separate post)
Surveyor: OK. We’ll call it hazardous and unusable.
3. Husband: Did you know the (400 hr) engine is smoking?
Broker: (crickets chirping)
4. Surveyor: Four of the batteries aren’t secured--unless someone is laying on the ¼ berth.
5. Surveyor: Did you know the boat doesn’t have a hot water heater?
Me: Yes.
Surveyor: (crickets chirping)
6. Surveyor: Let’s go sailing.
Husband: Did you see the whisker stays?
Surveyor: Yeah, let’s not put that under a load.
7. Me: Are those blisters in the hull?
Husband touches one & it squirts in his face.
(OK, not “heard,” but still funny)
8. Me: (after blisters are discovered) Did you know the broker is starting to touch my knee?
Husband: (laughter)
9. Surveyor: The alternator isn’t working.
Broker: Should we start the generator? (we’re motoring)
Surveyor: Sure. (To me, sitting on the generator). Is it loud?
10. The broker backing the boat into the haul out (too long and to much cursing to share)

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